Post by Clutch [FM] on Aug 1, 2015 11:05:07 GMT -5
There's this circular booth at Dooby's Bar where patrons hang their guns and tell stories that one usually shares in a bar over a pint of ale. Be heard of your PZ unrelated stories that you'd like to share.
--- Rule: never forget to sip some beer/ale before it gets warm!
Clutch
So our house was a breeding ground for cats. *Sip* We had seven cats of varying ages from one original female or who my mother used to call the 'den mother'.
I was assigned to feed them one night so I had their bowls prepped outside on our front yard porch with food and leftovers from our plates. The dog was fed below the porch since he was a greedy bastard (which was pretty elevated about above my knee).
Mom and dad were chillin' at the porch that time too. Basically, everyone was in place except for Den Mom who was on her FOURTH pregnancy at the time.
I looked around then I saw her hissing at the dog. She tryna ward him away to get all the food - greedy bitch. So I went down the porch and carried her. My ever supportive folks chuckle at my struggle for carrying her and probably four more babies up to the porch. THEN I TRIPPED! Cats have excellent landing reflexes, thank god. Unfortunately, her belly hit the edge of the platform still. Then I said, "Ooh, right in the children"
Then my folks burst in laughter, So did me and my siblings, and even the cats and the dog probably.
*sip*
Also I swear this one happened but probably unoriginal: Teacher once called me on the telephone. *long sip*
"Oh so I hope you've done the layout for this and that and this and that. I'll be looking forward to see them tomorrow. Don't be late. See you clutch."
Then I said, "OK, I love you." like it's second nature (result of parents getting mad at you when you don't say 'I love you' every after calls and them being the only people who call me)
After a milisecond, I froze in fear.
"Uhhhh" said my teacher then I quickly hung up.
Worse part is that my teacher's a married man.
Then came morning to torture me with having to meet said techer on first period. Gave him the prints of the things he asked for after class and quickly left without a word. Zero Shiets taken.
--- Rule: never forget to sip some beer/ale before it gets warm!
Clutch
So our house was a breeding ground for cats. *Sip* We had seven cats of varying ages from one original female or who my mother used to call the 'den mother'.
I was assigned to feed them one night so I had their bowls prepped outside on our front yard porch with food and leftovers from our plates. The dog was fed below the porch since he was a greedy bastard (which was pretty elevated about above my knee).
Mom and dad were chillin' at the porch that time too. Basically, everyone was in place except for Den Mom who was on her FOURTH pregnancy at the time.
I looked around then I saw her hissing at the dog. She tryna ward him away to get all the food - greedy bitch. So I went down the porch and carried her. My ever supportive folks chuckle at my struggle for carrying her and probably four more babies up to the porch. THEN I TRIPPED! Cats have excellent landing reflexes, thank god. Unfortunately, her belly hit the edge of the platform still. Then I said, "Ooh, right in the children"
Then my folks burst in laughter, So did me and my siblings, and even the cats and the dog probably.
*sip*
Also I swear this one happened but probably unoriginal: Teacher once called me on the telephone. *long sip*
"Oh so I hope you've done the layout for this and that and this and that. I'll be looking forward to see them tomorrow. Don't be late. See you clutch."
Then I said, "OK, I love you." like it's second nature (result of parents getting mad at you when you don't say 'I love you' every after calls and them being the only people who call me)
After a milisecond, I froze in fear.
"Uhhhh" said my teacher then I quickly hung up.
Worse part is that my teacher's a married man.
Then came morning to torture me with having to meet said techer on first period. Gave him the prints of the things he asked for after class and quickly left without a word. Zero Shiets taken.